I’m unsure what drove me to do it, but I recently decided to momentarily lose my mind and purge our entire house. It started in late September and ended a week ago, much to everyone’s relief. I was a force that could not be stopped, and there was a great reckoning. Let it be known that I am not a complete glutton for punishment, but we were overdue since I found an evidential photograph circa 2020. It was of my youngest promptly placing himself into one of those giant trash bags, mid-purge. There we were, surrounded by all our shame, and he thought no one would notice if he just became the trash. We moved spaces in the great musical bedroom event of 2022, but I don’t think we cleaned out much in our desperation to finish. When running a business and working from home, things can be chaotic with samples and projects galore. All of us struggle to find time for such a huge undertaking. Thus, our title: The Great Closet Cleanout. Blame it on our first leaving the nest, but I’ve been on a mad journey to simplify and regroup and make things make sense in our home. {Do you think he’d notice if we moved the Peloton into his room??} My back hurts. So, ten bags of trash/recycling + twenty-one bags of donation items later… I told you it had been a few years. I say keep it authentic and relatable for real-life success. Here are a few things I’ve learned with the great s̶h̶a̶m̶e̶ ̶s̶p̶i̶r̶a̶l̶ closet cleanout.
Keeping it real: Yes, that is my son’s graduation robe you see hanging in the back. I have no idea why. Chaos on top of chaos… I could never find anything. And this was halfway through the removal of things. My closet is a catchall.
• Start where you feel motivated.
Half the battle of purging comes down to starting anywhere you feel motivated to begin and actually complete the task. I had a business trip coming up, and I felt that my closet could use a spruce-up in the wardrobe department. So, my rationale was that cleaning out my closet would help me realize what I actually had, and I could reward myself by updating a little from there. Or shopping without going shopping… in my own closet. I was determined to win either way.
• It won’t happen in one day.
Still looking to hype yourself up? Once you’re motivated to tackle one space, realize it won’t all happen in one day. So think in terms of sections. In both time and areas of your house. Purging your home can be one of the most overwhelming feelings ever, especially when looking at this process and how it spans out. When it came to my childrens’ spaces, backpacks had been shoved into closets for the last three years on the final day of school, never to be seen again. Clothes that were long grown out of were shoved in the back. Stocking stuffers and EASTER CANDY, friends. I snapped a picture of my daughter’s room mid-process because I was proud of our progress, and she shouted, “Don’t SHAME ME!” The message was received, though that was not my intent. No one will ever see that pic. I told her she would gladly reflect on it when we finished. But just know… it’s a LOT. So, pace yourself—one step at a time. “Bird by Bird,” as one of my fave authors, Anne Lamott would say. This leads me to…
• Don’t be too harsh.
Part of the reason that purging can be so exhausting is the self-talk you give yourself when doing so. Be mindful. And when purging with kids, I have to add, give them some grace since the older ones can be quite defensive when you’re pulling out the third round of senseless garbage from under beds and drawers. Our youngest deadpan looked me in the eyes and told me he still wanted his giant stuffed duck when it was going to be donated, and I thought he was being sarcastic. No, he really wanted the duck. This six-foot football player freshman still wants his stuffed duck. I could cry with joy. You don’t have to be a militant minimalist to have a realistic, clean home. It’s attainable. You can also give yourself {and others} a little grace.
• This is self-care.
Purging {and cleaning} your house is the ultimate form of self-care. Even though it’s also the worst, most laborious part of owning a home, it’s a natural part of the homeowner cycle, and it’s good to clean it out. It’s healthy. It can be mentally rewarding, too, once you get past the exhaustion of one million little choices. Here are the two hardest parts: getting started, and once you’ve pulled everything out at that halfway point, everything is in absolute chaos, and you hate your life, thinking that you are the reason people hate Americans. You want to lie down and bury yourself in an avalanche of shame. I often feel like the person on the horse who’s all “For NARNIAAAAA” until I reach that halfway point. When you do get to that point, here are a few things: a. Taking photos helps you remember how far you’ve come. I’m weird like that, but try it. b. Remember that you’re doing good with your donations. c. Eyes on the prize because all this will be worth it. d. Reward yourself with something you truly value. Make it pretty, integrate a new system, or buy shoes to replace the tattered ones you’re sad about. No, I’m not saying to replace junk with junk. Just keep it real and attainable. People can be psychotic about this topic. I say keep it authentic and relatable for real-life success.
• If a system isn’t working, ditch it
When we finally spread out into our space and gave our daughter ours, I was so excited to hang all my workout clothes. For some reason, I thought hanging would be best, and I could save the world this way. I quickly learned that I’m too lazy to hang my clothes each time since I wear these the most all day, every day, and they’re better off folded in a drawer. I also had too much to see when hanging. But it took me two years to change it again. Now I have my denim right where I can see it, and my overwhelming workout clothes that I wear daily are better serving me in a drawer. Which brings me to…
• Keep a system that works for you.
Organize by color and type. Not everything has to be rainbow mania in your closet, but I did find that certain kinds of blouses, together with others, are helpful. Also, lesser-worn items are put in areas that are harder to reach, and the staples go front and center. Do you know how thrilled I am to have a drawer dedicated solely to bras? It’s truly rewarding. Also, my closet is not very large {though it was certainly an upgrade from our last one}, so slimline hangers for the win. I also brought in two of these bookshelves for my shoes since my closet is an odd shape, and it works. I use hooks on my wall for hats, scarves, bags and more. I can grab them at a glance and they work with my limited space. Pool noodles for tall boots. You’ll thank me later.
• Containers aren’t always the solution.
I found myself ditching a lot of baskets and containers because unless I had things folded the Marie Kondo way, certain baskets just weren’t working. Organizers love to tout those container methods, but sometimes they aren’t the answer, and they can make things feel even more out of control. Free yourself. Keep things where you can see them. And slowly eliminate them when you find yourself NOT wearing them. I can now see what I own and not get caught in the endless, exhausting cycle of wearing the same thing over and over again because I have no idea where fill-in-the-blank-here went. Jamin hasn’t heard me bemoan that “I HAVE NOTHING TO WEAR” in a while now. Thanks, closet.
Side note: Clients are always wondering what to do with their closets, and it can become a major money suck quickly. I think if you’re starting fresh and wanting to come up with a whole system for your closet, it’s best to start with images that suit you best, then work on your budget from there. Can a fill-in system like this one work best? Or how about a trim carpenter who can build exactly what you need? Or do you want to work with a professional closet company? Lots of options for lots of different price ranges. Start with the images that inspire you the most, and work backward from there on budget and reality… the magic is where all those possibilities meet, and you can figure out what works best for you.
These containers are simple pull out drawers for my jewelry, and they do work. So keep the ones that are working.
• Clear your floors.
Unless you absolutely can’t, keep them clear. I’ve learned quickly that my floors are cluttered in pure exasperation when things are out of control. Remember to keep those floors clear daily, but most definitely when you’re decluttering. This applies to my office, too. It’s a simple rule, but a huge one in my book.
The mantra “If you wouldn’t buy it now, throw it out,” isn’t always true.
I’m going to add something controversial here. People love having giant closets for a reason. You don’t have to toss everything. My daughter is currently dressing like me in high school because the nineties are back. She walked by us the other day on her way to school, and Jamin said, “Oh look, it’s you in college.” She was my clone at that moment, donning overalls and those Birkenstock clogs. What goes around comes around. I was on a stupid, self-righteous purge a few years ago and cleaned out my pointy-toed heels. Guess what’s back this season? In my defense, they weren’t ‘nice’ brands. But if you previously loved an item, and it still fits… don’t get rid of it. Stash it in a basket at the top of your closet. I have an entire section for that, and you can pry my JCrew flare-leg khakis and patten-leather red kitten heels out of my cold, dead fingers. I still have the shoes I purchased in London that I wore the day I met Jamin. Some things are meant for keeping. Allow yourself that. We don’t all have to be hardcore minimalists.
It feels good to have a lot of our house cleaned up. These are some of my faves if you’re looking to refresh your life a little. I truly hope this helps. {I’m just glad most of the house is done.} As always, I’d love to hear from you. What are some of your favorite tips? Have an inspired day!
